はにわちゃん
かなしばり
. ^..
~:!:!:. : : : :
^:~:!:!:!:7:7:7:7:~.:
:::^~^~^!:~:!:^.~.7:7:7:7.~..
::~~~^~^~::.. !: ..:.7.!.!:!.
:^~~~~~^~^. !: :.7.!.!.^
.^^~^~^:~^~: !:. ..!.!.~.^
^!^~^^ ~~: !:. ::!.~.~
^!^! ^~ .:!: .!:!:~:^
:^!^^ :^. !:!: ^:!:~:~
. . ^.~.^.: . ^^!:. .^: ~:!:!: :!:!:~
..7:7:7:7:7:7:7:!:!^!:. .^.^:!:!:~. :!:!:~..
. !:7:7:!.~.~.~.~.~:!^!^!^^ ~^!^!:!: :!:!:~::
.!:7:!.~. .:^:~^! ^^~^~^!^^. :!:!:~::
~:!:!.: .:^ :^~^~^~^~. :!:!:~:.
^:!:7:. :^~~~^~^~^ :!:!:!..
!:!:: :^~~~~~~~:~: :!:!:!
::!:!: :^~^~~~^:. !: ::!:!:!
!:!:^ ^~^~^~:. !^ .!:!:!:!
!:!: :~^!^~^: !^ :7:!:!:^
!:!: ^!^!^~ ..!^!:!:!:~. :!:!:!.
!:!: :^!^! ..~^!^!:!:!:!:!. ~:!:!:!
!:!:^ ~^!:~ ~^~^~:!:~:!:!:!:~ .7:!:!:!
!:!:!: .~^! ~~~~^: !^ ..~.7:7. .7:!:!::
^:!:!:: ^^! ~~~^ !^. 7:7:. ^:7:7:7
.!:!:7:: ^! ~~^. ::^ ^:7:^ .!.7:7:!
~:!:!:!:: ^!.. :^^: .!. .7:: .7:7:7.:
.!:!:!:7.^. .:^~ ~~. !: :.7. ..7:7:7
..7:7:7:7.~.~ :~:: .:: !: 7:~ ~:7:7:7
. !:7:!.7.!.!.~.^.. :~:: !^. !:~ .7:7:7:!
:.!.!.!.!.!:!:!:!:~:~^~^~^^^:... ..!:!:~. .7:7:7:^
:.!.!.!.!:!:!:!^!^~^~~~~^~^~^!:!:!:. .7:7:7..
:.!:!:!:!^!^~^~~~~^~^!^!^!:!:!:!:~...7:7:7
...::^^^^^^^~^~^!:!:!:!:7:7:7:7:7:7
.... ..^.!:!.~.!:7:7:7:7
..~~~~^: ^:^ ..~.~.7:7
~~~~~^~^:. ::~ ^.~.
~~~~~^~^^. ::^ .
~~~~~^~^ !:.
.:~~~:. ~:!.
..~^^:~:~:^.
. . .
Directory
𝄞
The place where i dare to be myself.
If you are sensitive, don't go further in this website.
About
Hello. I am the webmistress, and i am 2X years old. I deal with OCD and some other mental illnesses, which make me live a life bounded to delighting fantasy and worrying about my own identity obsessively, to the point of achieving anxiety and despair at the thought of not being myself. I am deeply afraid of losing control over myself, and this website may help me feel a bit more in control over my own life. Here i want to talk about things and collect information, is specific anything japanese, i love anything japanese and this website will contain lots of japanese culture.
Something important is that i have a big fear of turning into an adult, even though, in terms of age, i already am one. The true fear is changing suddenly, turning into a responsible human being and not being able to have fun with my favorite things. I have no interest in the common life of an adult. I don't want to get out of home, have friends, go to gatherings and mask to appear more mature and less odd. I don't want to suddenly be perceived by others as not innocent, it makes me disgusted of myself to think of myself as am adult. All i want is to be myself, truly be myself.
This got long and a bit rambly so i hope it's okay. English is NOT my first language so i probably write everything in a strange way but that's not a problem, as long as i make myself understood.